Wednesday, October 10, 2012


Am I the only one that craves validation and approval? I want my wife to tell me that I do a good job supporting the family and loving the kids. I want my clients to tell me I am the best agent they've ever had. I want my parents to tell me they are proud of me. I want my friends to tell me I am a good friend. I want my broker to tell me I am doing a good job representing his company. ETC, ETC, ETC. For the most part, I get that validation. I get it in the form of pats on the back or kind words or referrals to client's friends, etc. I get lots of validation from lots of sources.

Why is it, then, that I get bent out of shape when one, just one person doesn't give me the validation or approval I seek? They don't even necessarily give the opposite of validation or approval, they just don't give anything. Why does that bother me? I know in my head that I can't please everyone and, further, sometimes I mess up. I also know that some people just don't give compliments, no matter how good the service. It's just not part of who they are. I know all this, yet it still gets to me sometimes. Not every time, just sometimes. Why do I let myself get bothered?

I think it is important to tell people when they do a good job at something. People like to hear it. I think it is a good trait to be the person that makes others feel good about themselves (as long as it is sincere and not patronizing). Be that person. Be the one that notices when people do good work and then tell them. In the meantime, tell me how to quit craving other peoples' approval.


Anonymous said...

I wish I knew the answer to that one. I think we all need to feel appreciated and valued by others. God designed us to live in community and part of a community is support for its members. For myself I have to remember to appreciate those around me more. If we all did then no one would feel slighted.

Daniel said...

I'm in the same boat. I think it's a stronger issue for some than others... like a "love language."

Anonymous said...

Luke 14: 7-14 God knows and thats all that matters.

Post a Comment